


Don't go...

by QueenyClairey



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Accident, Alec is a firefighter, Anal Sex, Angst, Caring, Fear, Fear of loss, In Bed, Injury, Love, M/M, Magnus is a business man, Pain, Plane, Read the warnings, Sex, Top Alec, a character is thought dead, alec doesn't want him to go, alec gets his own way, crash, early morning, loving, magnus is late, no actual death, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-18
Updated: 2019-09-24
Packaged: 2020-10-21 05:15:40
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,680
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20688101
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QueenyClairey/pseuds/QueenyClairey
Summary: Magnus needs to catch his flight. Alec doesn't want him to go.A tiny, sexy drabble.





	1. Chapter 1

They’re tangled together in the sheets, Magnus’ arm wrapped across Alec’s waist, fingers toying with the bedsheets. Alec’s arm is around his shoulders, warm and comforting, his breath exhaling in small puffs against his neck. 

Magnus loves mornings like this, when they wake up slowly together, wrapped in their own little cocoon of love. He loves to kiss his husband softly awake, pressing tiny kisses in a row down his neck and over his adam’s apple until Alec shivers and slides his warm fingers over Magnus’ arm, tracing his bicep which he has always confessed to be his favourite part of Magnus’ body. 

“Darling?” He whispers, not wanting to break the peace. “I’m sorry, I have to go…”

Alec rolls over, reaching for the alarm clock to check the time. “No...I don’t want you to go!”

Then he tugs Magnus close, wrapping him tightly in his long arms and pulling him against his chest. Magnus can’t help the smile that curves his lips. With Alexander, he always feels loved. He doesn’t want to go either and tells him just as much, bringing his mouth to meet Alec’s soft one over and over again. As their tongues tangle, he feels contented, desired, aroused.

But he pulls away, he has to. 

“I have to catch the flight, Alexander,” he whispers.

“Can’t you stay instead? You could go later…”

The kisses he trails down Magnus’ neck work their magic quickly and he soon finds him pressed beneath Alec, a hand gently pumping his naked erection. 

“Alec!” he stutters, breath hitching with every stroke of Alec’s hand. 

He spins in his hold so that Alec’s cock rests gently between his cheeks, rubbing over his pucker which is still oiled up from the night before. 

Alec slides hot kisses over his neck and shoulders, dragging his cock against Magnus again and again until it hooks on his rim and begins to press into him. 

The hand encircling his cock continues to pump as Alec times his thrusts to match, pushing into him again and again, each stroke increasingly deeper. As they move as one, Magnus can’t help the deep groan that runs through him as his orgasm builds. 

Alec’s whole body is writhing behind him and then suddenly Magnus is being thrust onto his back, bouncing a little on the bed, Alec’s cock still buried deep inside him. He stares up into Alec’s hazel eyes, sees the love and admiration twinkling in them and surges up to slide his tongue into his mouth. 

They kiss deeply as Alec continues to thrust, bodies wrapped closer than before, Magnus’ dick sliding between them as they build towards their orgasms.

Magnus misses his flight.


	2. Making the plane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 2 - very different.
> 
> Magnus makes it to the airport, but has to take the next flight.
> 
> Disaster happens!
> 
> Read the tags!!!!!!!! ANGST! Crash!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well...
> 
> Chapter one - sweet
> 
> Chapter two - sad!
> 
> Sorry - I know there's a third chapter but I won't change the chapters until I've written it just in case!

Because Magnus is late to the airport, he has to take the next flight. It’s not direct, changing in Atlanta and he knows his boss is going to kill him. 

Camille is not the most understanding woman, and ever since he met and married Alexander, she has been even worse, sending him on these insane trips, far from home at the drop of a hat.

Today, because he missed the flight, he’s also missed the displeasure of over 5 hours on a plane alone with her while she flirts her way through half of the drinks trolley. And he’s so grateful that his husband pulled him back into the bed and made him feel so good. 

He wonders if secretly, Alec did it on purpose, his intention for Magnus to avoid having to sit with her. 

But Alec doesn’t know that his plan worked yet. As soon as they had showered, he’d been called into work for an emergency shift, so he’s down at the fire station, no phone on him, so there’s only a grey tick next to the message he sent him and it won’t turn blue while Magnus is in the air. 

Speaking of getting into the air, he heads over to the departures board and sees that his flight has started boarding, so he tosses his plastic bottle in the recycle bin and heads over to his gate.

As he lines up with the other passengers, a young mother catches his eye. She is struggling with a small toddler _and_ a baby in a pram, so he heads over to offer his help. 

She is grateful, introducing herself as Catarina, and accepting his support with her little girl, Madzie, as she slips baby Max onto her hip and tries to fold the pushchair for boarding. 

He drops to his knees to help her and together they manage to sort it out. They make their way to the desk just as the flight finishes boarding and once they are on board, he offers to hold baby Max while she settles Madzie in her seat. 

As Catarina is strapping Madzie in, an air hostess stops by and advises them to take their seats. But as Magnus turns to pass Max back, Madzie’s little hand reaches out and tugs him down. 

“Please will you sit with me?” She asks.

“Oh sir,” Asks the attendant, overhearing the little girl’s words, “Aren’t you seated with your family? Let me try and sort that for you.”

And before Magnus can protest, she’s moving the man on the end of their row and making space for him beside Madzie. 

He decides not to protest as they’re next to the bulkhead and near to an exit which means he’ll be able to disembark quickly in Atlanta and make it over to his next flight on time. Settling in his seat, he listens to Madzie chatter about airplanes and how much she loves them.

Catarina gives him a bemused grin over her head and mouths, “She never likes strangers!”, so when the small girl reaches for his hand as the plane takes off, he curls his fingers around her own and smiles happily. 

He and Alexander are desperate to have children, and in the future he sees them adopting and making a little found family of their own. This is definitely good practise. 

They’re almost an hour into the flight when there’s a sudden metallic clang. Magnus’ eyes are drawn to the people in the window seats who have started to stare out of the window. One lady yells, “It just fell off!” and then the whole cabin is in a state of panic.

Magnus stays calm, checks Madzie’s seatbelt is fastened, and Catarina’s too, puts their airline issued cushions and blankets in their laps and prepares for the worst. 

With a husband in the fire department he’s heard almost every sad story that could be told, and he’s heard one that starts almost like this. 

He exchanges worried glances with Catarina as the ‘Fasten Seatbelt’ sign flicks on and the plane begins to bounce. 

The air crew run down the aisles yelling for people to buckle up and then all hell breaks loose!

Oxygen masks drop from the ceiling, overhead compartments pop open and suitcases start falling out. The drinks cart rolls down the aisle, narrowly missing one of the air crew, who twists to the side as it crashes in to the bulkhead wall. 

She is clearly in shock, so Magnus reaches with the hand that isn’t clasped tightly in Madzie’s and grabs her waist, stopping her from falling over.

“You’re okay Ma'am. What do you need us to do?”

“Thank you,” she pants, sounding like she’s just run a marathon as the plane continues to buck and rock like some kind of violent bull. “Just stay in your seats and keep your seat belt fastened, I’ll sort that out.”

She indicates the crumpled drinks cart, liquor bottles smashed and rolling all over. But Magnus hisses at her, low and just for her ears, “Leave it. You need to sit down. I don’t think this is going to be good.”

Her terrified eyes meet his and she nods, rushing to her seat as the screams of fearful passengers fill the metal box. 

It feels like a long time, but in reality it’s only a few minutes, before the pilot’s panicked voice comes over the tannoy.

“Brace For Impact! Brace! Brace!”

As one, the whole plane bend their heads, arms wrapped around their knees or pressed to the seat in front. Magnus holds Madzie tightly with an arm around her as he directs her head down, while Catarina does the best she can with baby Max. Then there’s silence.

Apart from the odd wail of a baby, the odd scream of a passenger who’s hysterical, the rest are silent. There’s no engine noise, no whirring of the propellers, nothing machine based at all, and then the lights go out.

In the darkness, he feels Madzie’s small body trembling and he begins to sing to her, an Indonesian lullaby his mother once sang to him. 

His is the only voice on the whole plane as it coasts down towards the ground.


	3. Without You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec's at work...when he hears some news.

Alec’s at the fire station, eating a plate of spaghetti when the alarm goes off. As one the whole room races into action, slipping straight into their usual roles. 

Alec’s driving tonight, so he hotfoots it into his gear and hauls himself into the fire truck, Jace at his side. 

When they reach the site, they find another crew already working on the burning building, so they quickly liaise with the fire chief and start to join in the battle. Everyone’s been evacuated so it’s the building they’re racing to save now. 

It takes them several hours, but eventually, it’s damp enough to be considered safe, so they rush back to the truck and home to Ladder 18. 

When they arrive, there’s a strange atmosphere. Luke is waiting for them as he often does, but he looks solemn and unusually grim. 

“Alec?” he asks, as he climbs down from the rig and slips off his smokey, sodden trousers. 

Alec acknowledges his boss and follows him into the small office off the side of the engine bay. He slumps into Luke’s spare chair and spins himself once, waiting for his captain to speak. 

“Alec, I’m so sorry.”

It’s not what Alec expected to hear. Luke should be asking him for his report. Asking about water tonnage, and damage and what equipment needs replacing. Instead he’s looking at him, that same solemn expression unchanging. 

“There’s been an accident, Alec.”

Alec stares at him, mind immediately on his sister who was travelling north to stay with their parents this weekend. But before he can speak, Luke continues.

“Magnus’ plane. It came down. There are reports of survivors, hope isn’t lost. But we should probably get you down to the scene or the hospitals or something as soon as possible…”

Alec’s entire stomach turns to steel. It feels like a fist is clenching everything inside him. It feels like his heart’s stopped beating, like he’s forgotten how to breathe.

“Magnus?” He breathes out, voice almost impossible to hear above the roaring of the blood in his ears. 

Then: “No! Not Magnus!”

His yell is loud enough that Jace comes bursting through the door, arms gripping him as Luke explains. He excuses them straight away and Jace bundles him out of the office and into the changing room, treating him with kid gloves as he helps him into fresh clothes. 

The cellphone in his pocket feels like a lead weight. 

What will he find if he turns it on?

He lets his brother treat him like a child.

“What do you want to do?” Jace asks, voice sounding like it’s coming from miles away.

“Magnus.” Is his only thought, so Jace pulls him out to his car, rifling through his pockets for his keys. Alec feels like he’s in another world. Like he’s not part of this reality. He can’t be. In his world, there is Magnus. Here there might not be.

He cannot do anything. Just sits as his brother drives them, on the phone to Luke as he finds out where to go. 

Still Alec cannot think. He cannot bear to think. He is nothing without him.

If Magnus is gone, he is nothing. 

They drive for almost three hours. Jace’s phone silent the whole time. No updates.

When they reach the site, there’s a huge plume of smoke still in the air. It’s turning a light grey, so Alec knows they’ve contained the fire and are just cooling down the scene. 

It’s been hours since the plane came down, yet there are still blue flashing lights everywhere. Alec knows the protocol, years before as a rookie he had attended a downed plane and it had not been pretty.

But this was a commercial jet. Hundreds of people, not the trio involved in the tiny crash he had attended. 

It was impossible to imagine the carnage in front of him. Terrifying to imagine what the devastation was going to look like. 

But he needed to see.

He and Jace battled their way to the police line, trying desperately to find someone to speak to, to help them. 

Apart from yelling Magnus’ name, he hasn’t spoken once. He can’t. He’s scared of what he would say if he did. Or worse, of beginning to cry and being unable to stop.

Eventually, there is a police officer, dressed in a heavy black coat. It reminds Alec that it’s cold. But he hasn’t felt it til now. Suddenly it rushes through him, his hands starting to shake, teeth chattering and skin covered in goosebumps. 

“My brother-in-law was on the plane.” Jace says, voice desperate as he speaks to the officer. “Can you help us?”

“I can check the logs if you can tell me his name?” The man replies, eyes already scanning sheets of white paper. 

“Magnus Lightwood-Bane.” Alec croaks out, the first tear escaping and starting a salty path down his cheek. 

“I see his name here.” The officer says, eyes flashing between the two men. “He was in the rear of the plane.”

It’s all he needs to say for Alec to lose it. His knees slam into the ground, shock reverberating through him. 

He’s seen the tail. It’s there in the distance, a crumpled mass of twisted metal, smoke still trickling out of it. 

If Magnus was in there, he’s definitely gone. 

Jace asks a question, but he doesn’t hear it. It’s like he’s inside a thick jelly bubble, all sounds dimmed, eyes unable to focus. He feels a heavy hand on his shoulder, squeezing tightly. Then Jace is hauling him to his feet and pulling him away from the police tape.

Alec feels like a puppet, unable to control his own actions as he is dragged. He stumbles over his own feet and begins to fall. But Jace catches him and then they’re at his car and Alec is inside and his body starts to heat up as Jace flicks on the engine.

“He told us to go to the hospital.”

“If he…” he can’t say it. He doesn’t want to say it. If he says it, it will be real.

“We’re going to the hospital, Alec.” Jace reaches out and covers his tight fist with his own, squeezing.

They reach the hospital in silence, Alec almost lost it. Almost cried. But he won’t. Not until he’s holding Magnus’ body. No matter what, he’ll keep himself in control until then.

His training kicks in. Every fire he’s ever attended there at the back of his mind. The ones they fought, the ones they lost out to, the ones they defeated with no losses. They all play through his mind. He’s strong. He can do this. He has to. Magnus is his husband, best friend and Alec is Magnus’ only true family. So he has to do this.

There are clusters of people in the hospital. Clearly families and friends. Many are crying. Many staring blankly as Alec was before. But some are arguing angrily with the nurses at the desk, all their terror pouring out and ravaging the clean air. 

Alec doesn’t know what he should do. But Jace does.

Jace speaks calmly and asks for help. Jace finds a nurse who can show them where to go. Jace finds the nurse who finds Magnus’ name and seat number on a list. 

He doesn’t cry. Still he doesn’t cry.

Alec feels utterly numb as the nurse speaks her platitudes. He knows that hope is lost. But it doesn’t feel real. 

He sinks to his knees on the hospital floor. All strength is gone.

It might be minutes or hours. Jace has gone to find out more. He’s in a chair by a wall, head tipped back against it. 

“Mister?” Something’s tugging on his sleeve, “Mister?”

There’s a girl beside him on the chair. She’s got beautiful cornrows and a cut on her forehead with butterfly stitches through it. Her right arm is in a sling, flour white. 

He grunts at her, lifting his head upright. 

“Mister are you okay? You look sad.”

Alec can’t reply. It hurts too much. 

“Mister, if you’re sad, I can sing you a song?”

He stares at her, wants her to go away reall,y so he can wallow in his grief, but she’s insistent and she’s hurt. He can never say no to insistent and hurt little girls. Or any little girls or children at all really.

She begins to sing. Her voice is soft and high. The tune is familiar, something he’s heard before. He knows he recognises it. But as he grasps to recall it, Jace arrives back at his side. 

His expression is grim. He looks like the last time they went into a fire and one of their men didn’t come out.

“I’m so sorry Alec. They found him. They said you can see him. Do you want to?”

Alec collapses. His entire body shaking. His sobs wrack his body, hard and agonising, yet strangely silent.

“Magnus!” he howls, the only sound he makes.

The little girl stops singing. A tiny hand touches his shoulder as it shakes. 

“Magnus?” she says. His name in her voice hurts him more than he could have imagined. There’ll be no children calling him Papa Magnus now. 

Alec’s body shakes even harder and Jace’s fingers dig into his shoulder. 

“I know Magnus!” The little girl says. 

Alec’s head shoots up.

“Wh..a..t?” he stutters out. 

“He’s my friend!” the girl exclaims, reaching out soft fingers to rub at the tears on his cheeks. “Don’t cry mister, Magnus says you should only cry if you really really have to. He says you can sing the song to stop you crying. Shall I sing it again?”

Alec’s heart breaks all over again. Magnus must’ve sung the song to cheer her up when the plane came down. It doesn’t mean he’s still here. Doesn’t mean he’s alive. 

The girl begins to sing. Her voice is stronger now and Alec definitely recognises the tune. It’s one of Magnus’ Indonesian lullabies from his youth, with quite different words that the girl must be making up.

She must be exceptionally bright, because he can’t really remember the tune and Magnus has been singing it to him for the best part of a decade. 

Suddenly, a voice calls out, “Madzie?” And a woman is rushing down the corridor towards them. The little girl stands up straight and is engulfed in the woman’s arms. She also has cuts on her face and a bandage wrapped around her elbow. The look of relief on her face is torture as she finds the person she is missing. He is not going to find his. 

“Mummy! This man knows Magnus!”

“Oh darling, are you sure?” the woman asks, glancing between Jace and Alec. 

“Yes! He said his name. He knows him.”

“Maybe there is more than one Magnus sweetie?” The woman suggests, but Madzie shakes her head. 

“No, Magnus is your Magnus you know the song, right Mister?”

Alec’s head nods of its own accord, but it’s lacklustre, he cannot summon any charm for the little girl and her mother. 

“Oh my goodness! Are you Alexander?” The woman asks, hand flying to her face in shock.

“Yes, this is Alec,” Jace answers for him. “Do you know anything…” he trails off and the woman looks between them, finally putting together the tear tracks on both their faces.

“Oh my dears, please, come with me!”

Then she is grabbing Alec’s arm and tugging him along the corridor, Madzie holding his hand with her good one. And Alec lets them pull him, unsure of what exactly he is going to see.

Magnus sitting upright in a hospital bed, bandage around his head, leg in traction, sling on his arm, holding a cup of tea and beaming a bright smile, is not it.

Alec doesn’t feel himself move. Just knows that one second he is beside the door and the next Magnus is in his arms. 

They hold each other for the longest time, Magnus’ whispered words of comfort drowned by Alec’s happy sobs. Jace and Madzie and the woman (Catarina) give them some space, so they are alone when they draw back and Alec’s mouth finds Magnus’ drawing him as close as he dare with his multiple injuries. 

“I can’t believe you’re safe. You were in the tail and...they didn’t make it.”

“Oh darling, I tried to call so many times. My seat was moved. That little girl, she saved my life! I was so lucky!”

They talk all over each other, kissing and hugging and always attached in some way. Then the others pile back into the room, chattering away and Alec holds Catarina and then Madzie, thanking them for saving his love. His life. 

Catarina shakes her head, “No, he saved us! Without him, we wouldn’t be here, and nor would Max. We are the lucky ones!”  
\-------

Every year, Catarina and Madzie and Max visit Alec and Magnus at their home. They don’t spend time reminiscing about the crash. Instead they play games and make food and share their lives. And with them are Alec and Magnus’ children, Rafael and Max Lightwood-Bane.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think!
> 
> I kind of needed a dramatic Tuesday night write...had a bit of a day at work so it was good to get this all out...
> 
> @ClaireyCookey on Twitter


End file.
